Thursday, June 14, 2012

The Funnies Of Flight Safety

When you have a long plane know one that starts in San Antonio, Texas and with some layovers in Chicago, Illinois and Munich Germany but eventually gets to Budapest Hungary (more to come on that topic later) the next have to find things to entertain yourself.  My choice was the safety flight brochure found in the pocket of the seat in front of me.  I took pictures and have made up my own dialogues to go with them!  I understand why they  just go with pictures as the wording can become rather lengthy!

Picture One

Flight Safety Sign 1

If the plane is about to crash into the ground or into the water, men, put your head on the seat in front of you and women you have to put your head between your knees (Good luck with that!).  If there is a child beside you, push the child forcefully down.  It will save your life.  We are not sure how it will help the child, but as we know, you will be only concerned about yourself at this point.  Also, put your seat belt on for ultimate safety in case of a plane crash. This way you will be strapped to your chair as it plummets directly into the ground or water. Lastly, close your eyes if you are an adult, the child should keep their's open.

Picture Two

Flight Safety Sign 2

Ok, look.  We understand your right to breastfeed in public, but seriously, if we are about to crash you might want to think about stopping for just a few minutes. We are just saying, it might be safer if you stopped.  Please don't be offended, it is really  just a suggestion.

Picture Three

Flight Safety Sign 3

If you look out the window with a ski mask on and you see smoke, fire, glass (how that got out there, we are not sure), or water don't open stuff.  Nothing, not even your mouth! Now if you are not wearing a ski mask and you see this stuff outside the window, well, there are no rules here but feel free to open whatever you feel like.

Picture Four

Flight Safety Sign 4

Ladies, remember, just because there is an emergency and you might be floating in a river, a lake, the ocean, or a very large swimming pool it is very important that your continue to act like a lady and keep your knees together, your ankles crossed, and your hair in perfect style as you were taught in etiquette school.

Picture Five

Flight Safety Sign 5

As your airline, we care not only about your safety, but also your health.  Stop smoking.  It will kill you. (Someone should really tell the Europeans this....)

Picture Six

Flight Safety Sign 6

When the right time comes, and keep in mind not everyone gets this privilege, modified duck masks will fall from the ceiling.  Put yours on first, because really it is too much fun to wait for others, and then put on one the dumpy kid sitting beside you.  He really needs the help as you can tell, bless his heart.  (You can say anything you want about a person as long as you add, "bless his/her heart", at the end.  That makes it all better.)

Picture Seven, last one!

Flight Safety Sign 7

This last one is a quiz.  You heard us say as we went through the instructions with you that if there was an emergency and you were sitting in an exit aisle that you would be responsible for opening the door and then helping others out.  Which one of the pictures above shows the correct procedure?  Note that all of the above did start with a person putting on the required ski mask before looking out the window.

The answer is A and C.  The person in B is the only one who stayed to help.  The others did the right thing and ran for their lives.  Notice how they are no longer even in the picture once they got the door open.  Plus, we are sure they sat at the exit so they could be the first ones out! Survival of the fittest is our philosophy, too!

Thank you for choosing our airline.  We know you have a choice when choosing an airline and we hope you had an enjoyable flight!  Bye  now!

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Life In An Unparalleled World

School is out for the summer!  To me that means one thing, our trip to Budapest Hungary with a side trip to Bratislava Slovakia is now the top priority!  But I have have one more school related post before jumping on a plane and heading east. One of the final projects that my Geometry class had a choice of choosing was the following:

  Show how different the world would be if there were no parallel lines by drawing a picture or series of pictures with an included description of how things would be different, by writing a poem or a story with an included illustration to go along with the poem or story, or by creating a video showing how things would be different. You will present this to the class either in a digital or non-digital manner.

 There were other projects they could have picked, but I had two students pick this one.  I wanted to share the pictures drawn by one student and a poem written by another student.  I really liked the pictures and the poem blew me away.  (I told her it had to rhyme, because I taught math and that is how poetry needed to be in my math world.)  

Pictures first by Marissa.

Unparalleled comunity
This is a community and how it would look with no parallel lines.  Roads are crazy and houses even crazier.

Unparalleled buliding2
Example 1 of how an unparalleled house could look.

Unparalleled building
Example 2 of how an unparalleled house could look.  Looks a little melted!

Now the poem by Morgan.

An Unparalleled World

In the morning Susie woke
And fell right out of bed
And this was quite a painful thing
Because she hit her head

When she came to, once again
Inspection soon disclosed
She had fallen off her mattress
‘Cause its edges had transposed

Instead of resting straight across
From each opposite side
The borders were crooked and wrong
Parallelity defied

Moving on from her changed room
Susie was in for more
In place of a rectangle
Was a pentagonal door

The hallways curved and twisted
Toward the living room
Where she plopped down on the rounded couch
And tried to watch some toons

This wasn’t easy, she soon learned
To watch a TV set
When in place of a nice square
A triangle’s what you get

She flew into a frenzy then
Horrified by what she found
Nothing lined up side by side
And many things were round

She ran outside the twisted gate
Trying not to see
Then tripped on the curved edges
And fell to scrape her knee

The odd buildings looked unstable
As she ran along the street
Headed to the railway
Where she had a train to meet

The cars lined up beside the road
Were all perpendicular parked
The stop sign was a different shape
Though similarly marked

All the changes that she saw
Just made her more upset
But she made it to the station
Which was as far as she would get

She hadn’t thought of it before
But a train just wouldn’t work
If the tracks could not be side by side
A ride would go berserk

Desperate for a way to leave
She raced to a desk nearby
The man there asked her for her name
She was happy to comply

“Susie Keller,” she then panted
Waiting for a while
The man frowned at his circle screen
Then looked up, still no smile

“I think we have a problem ma’am
With the double-L
I’m sure that you have learned by now
But they are parallel.”

“But-“ she started, then she stopped
The understanding came
Without parallel lines she knew
It’d never be the same

Needless to say, but I will say it anyways, they both received a very high grade from me!  I love seeing my students creative sides!  Next post(s) will be about our trip to Budapest Hungary and Bratislava Slovakia.  Stay tuned for all the foreign excitement!