Sunday, July 24, 2016

Museo Nacional de Bellas Artes (National Museum of Fine Arts) - Santiago Chile

This is not your typical art post.  

There will be no, "Oh look at the beauty!  Look at the composition and how the pieces fit together to speak a story to me personally.  I feel tears springing to my eyes due to the immense feelings this work is invoking."

None of that.

Not that I have ever written a post like that about art. Mine are usually full of sarcasm and a bunch of, "That's art?!?"

This one is going to be a tad more sarcastic and you will come to understand why by the end even though it was all my own fault.

We went to the Museo Nacional de Bellas Artes (National Museum of Fine Arts) which was established in 1880 making it the oldest art museum in all of South America.

Museo de Bellas Artes Santiago Chile

It is a beautiful majestic building both outside and inside!

Ceiling and Women Columns Museo de Bellas Artes Santiago Chile

Now for the sarcastic humor through the telling of a story about the statues.

There once was a man who had many children.  For the most part the children got along but on occasion they would get into fights.  

One day the older kids were being especially brutal to one of the brothers. The siblings even stripped off his clothes to  hide them just for fun.  The brother being held up in the photo below was the victim of the day.  He finally had enough of his siblings and threw a fit!  He started hollering for father to come help him and to punish the others. He was being extremely dramatic much like major league soccer players who pretend to be hurt rolling on the ground holding some imaginary boo-boo.

El Descendimiemnto by Virginio Arias Museo de Bellas Artes Santiago Chile

Father had enough of his children's bickering so he starts yelling for all of them to come downstairs immediately!  He was ticked!

Horacio by Rebeca Matte Museo de Bellas Artes Santiago Chile

A few of the children that had nothing to do with the fight were petrified of getting in trouble and hovered by the door ready to bolt if they needed to get away from their father's wrath.  

The whole family is a tad on the dramatic side...

La Miseria by Ernesto Concha Museo de Bellas Artes Santiago Chile

Father settled the issue and the guilty ones were punished.  They had to go around the house and clean all the floors, windows, and toilets.  He told them that he would be watching them though the eyes of the face plates that were in every room of the house.

Face Door Plate Museo de Bellas Artes Santiago Chile

Father sat down wearily after all of that and contemplated leaving the country and his kids. 

Crudo Invierno by Rebeca Matte Museo de Bellas Artes Santiago Chile

But of course, we all know he didn't.  It was just a dream when times got hard.  He loved his kids and really wanted at least one of them to take care of him in his old age.  So he stuck it out and just kept them all in line through the fear of the all seeing face plates.

The End.

So those were some of the statues that were in the main lobby.  Those I could take pictures of.  Then we went into the actual gallery.

Now I will tell you why I felt the need to be so snarky.  So you see, apparently you can ONLY take pictures in the main lobby.  In the gallery some of the rooms had signs saying "No Photos" and some of the rooms didn't.

I will fully admit that I knowingly took a picture in a room with the "No Photos" sign.  As soon as I took it, a suite wearing security guard came up to me and told me not to take photos.  He said it in Spanish, but that time I understood.  Okay yes, I messed up.

Next we went into a different room and the "No Photos" sign was NOT there.  I thought it was okay for me to take a picture.  

So I did.  Here it is.  I really liked it!  That is why I took a picture of it!

The Painting That Almost Got Me Kicked Out of Museo de Bellas Artes Santiago Chile

That same security guard comes quickly up to me and motions for me to leave the building!!  I think I understood him to say this was my second warning and I had to go!

My heart was pounding!  I don't get in trouble!!  I honestly thought it was okay since there WAS NO SIGN!!

I got out my phone to use Google translate and here is what I wrote:

"No photos anywhere?"

The guard must have realized I was just another stupid American tourist and let me stay.  The whole time I was repeating over and over to him, "No mas fotos, no mas fotos!!"  (No more photos, no more photos!!)

He did tell me photos could be taken in the main lobby only, (gee, thanks for telling me NOW!) and that there were cameras all around watching. 

I usually ask and I didn't this time or there is a HUGE sign saying so before  you even walk in and in EVERY room.  (Every room, National Museum of Fine Arts, every room!)

As this was all happening, my dear precious husband just walked away like he didn't even know me! He was staring hard at the paintings like he was trying to blend in to them to get away from me!   

We quickly finished (there wasn't that much anyways and we were not that impressed) and left.

I had to sit outside for a few minutes to calm down.

I just had to stare at this tree and take some deep calming breaths.  

Fall Leaves Santiago Chile

I hope you enjoyed both my fake story and my real story, both of abuse, torture, and terror!

My next post will be about the kinder, friendlier, let you take a picture anywhere you want artisan craft market that we went to.  I hope you will return to read all about it.

Until then!